Overachievers Anonymous: How To Slow Down And Stop Pushing Yourself So Hard
We live in a culture where busyness is valued.
We feel valuable when we keep ourselves busy. When you live your life without ever stopping for rest, always pushing to the next level, you will miss out on so much beauty and risk damaging your health and relationships. The paperwork at your office will never go away. Taxes and housework are here to stay. Meal preparation, phone calls that need to be made and (for some of you) raising children, seem to scream (sometimes literally) for attention, but they do not define you. You do not have to take it all on to be good enough. Read that sentence again, then again.
For some of you, “slowing down” holds a very negative connotation. Some of you think that when people slow down they will get sick. Others think that they will never be able to catch up if they give themselves a break. You might feel that you aren’t achieving enough if you stopped pushing yourself so hard.
What would a more balanced lifestyle look like for YOU?
There’s a fine balance between being a high strung, overachiever and a laid back, unfocused fool. Both people have their pros and cons. The first person I described values productivity and therefore gets things accomplished, fast, but risks her/his health in the process. The second person values rest and spontaneity, therefore has more time for fun and rest but may lack foreward thinking and planning ahead. The trick is to identify what you need more of so you can begin to take steps towards a more balanced lifestyle.
Would you describe yourself as an overachiever? Then you likely feel that you are responsible for EVERYTHING most of the time! Others may think you are responsible for everything, simply because you have not given them space to work alongside you and contribute. By letting go of a little control you give others an opportunity to pick up the slack. Do your best to give them space to do things their way, not to your standards. This may require you to apply a few layers of duct tape to your mouth!
When you decide to give yourself a break you are acknowledging your needs. When you allow yourself to flop to the couch, take a coffee break or stop to enjoy the sights and smells outside before you rush off, you are not being lazy. Your sanity is very important. So how can you stop pushing yourself so hard?
Here are a few tips for you that won’t require too much energy to implement. Let me know if they help!
Evaluate Your Expectations Of Yourself
Do you have standards for yourself that are so high, no human would ever be able to meet them? Okay, maybe some humans would be able to but most of us don’t have superpowers. What do you expect of yourself? In business, at home, in your personal life. Are your expectations driving you insane? Identify where you need to cut yourself some slack and then begin to take the necessary steps to do so.
Let People Into Your Life
Some people think that a person with healthy boundaries is one who is able to say no and stick to her/his guns. There’s a very important flip side to having boundaries that is often overlooked. A person with healthy boundaries is also able to let people into her heart and personal space so that she can receive love and help. When you allow people in through the gate of your personal boundary fence you will be able to let your shoulders relax, even if it’s just a little. You may feel so accustomed to taking care of everything yourself that you’re not satisfied with others standards. This is very normal. You are not alone here! The trick is to give people space to do things differently than you. Let them express themselves and help you in the process. Instead of letting their standards drive you insane, focus on how their personal qualities add to your life.
Acknowledge and Celebrate Your Small Accomplishments
Sometimes the smallest victories get overlooked. My challenge for you is to take a step back from your life, if only for a minute. Look at all you have accomplished so far. And please, give yourself some credit. You may not always feel your effort is paying off. That’s why it’s SO important to take a broader look at your life, even each day so you can have a broader perspective. Looking at your life this way allows you to be more content and happy with yourself. I know you are a hard worker or you wouldn’t be reading this. So, think of your life as a piece of art. It takes time and persistence for an artist to create a beautiful piece of art. Every stroke or chip off the block leads the artist that much closer to a masterpiece. You are that masterpiece. Your life holds great value. Don’t discredit your small accomplishments. They aren’t going unnoticed.
Take life one day at a time and commit to treating yourself the way you want others to treat you.
Amy
